Don't Touch the Shaqtus

So now that the initial shock and outrage of the deal is out of the way, I want to look at the Kendrick Perkins trade more closely. Perkins, while offensively challenged, was the definition of a warrior on the court, providing outstanding defense and legitimate toughness alongside Kevin Garnett in the Celtics front court. He is now being replaced by a guy who can’t stay healthy (Shaq), a guy who once threw a chair WWE style during a brawl (Nenad Krstic) and a guy who has spent the last several months hearing everyone make jokes about him being dead (Jermaine O’Neal). While Perk’s mean streak can’t be replaced easily, the deal COULD make the Celtics better come playoff time. Jeff Green is extremely versatile, able to play SF and PF when needed. He can match up with players like LeBron James size-wise, and gives the Celtics a player who can actually help to reduce Paul Pierce’s minutes and score off the bench. Assuming Shaq is healthy (always risky unless the Phoenix Suns training staff is involved), the Celtics will not be forced to play 4 on 5 offense as they did with Perkins on the floor.

By making these trades, the Celtics now have three open roster spots to fill with buyout guys like Troy Murphy, a proven rebounder/3-point shooter when healthy. There’s also talk of Rasheed Wallace coming out of retirement, which would be a decent move unless he shows up looking like Rikishi for a second straight year.

- Like many other fans around the league, I was delighted by Chris Bosh’s epic brick-fest last night. Bosh shot 1-18 (the worst shooting night in 38 years) and flopped so egregiously on a phantom Carlos Boozer elbow that Cristiano Ronaldo would have been embarrassed. It was also amazing, and hilariously predictable, that Bosh, despite missing so many jumpers, couldn’t be bothered to post anyone up or drive to the basket.

- The Pistons turned down Caron butler and a 1st round pick in a potential deal for Tayshaun Prince. Of course they did. Joe Dumars, for whatever reason, refuses to trade him or Rip Hamilton for anything less than Blake Griffin.

- I almost feel bad for Baron Davis… the guy was playing in his hometown of LA with a suddenly popular team and the most exciting player in the league…. and now he’s heading to Cleveland… if he didn’t keep showing up overweight every season.

- The Jazz may have just pulled off the first “eff-you” trade of any superstar in league history… after the Jazz found out Deron WIlliams was the motivation for Jerry Sloan’s retirement, they shipped him off to Newark. Enough said.

Basically players who vaguely resemble dinosaurs:
Starters: Chauncey Billups, Ray Allen, Charlie Villanueva, Chris Bosh and KGBench: Richard Jefferson, Jermaine O’neal and Anthony Johnson Other Possiblities: Sam Cassell (space alien), Roy Hibbert/Pau Gasol (Llamas), Joakim Noah (some ugly dog breed)

In his latest podcast, Bill Simmons asked David Stern about who decided that the NBA would condone the posting of highlights as youtube clips. Stern revealed that it was a collective decision, but it really doesn’t matter who made the call. It’s brilliant. The NBA, the NHL and most recently the NFL all allow their highlights to remain on youtube, and as a result their best players are far more accessible than say, MLB’s. I have been a die-hard baseball fan since age 10, but recently my interest for anything baseball that doesn’t involve the Red Sox has been in rapid decline. The lack of youtube highlights isn’t the entire reason, but it’s a major factor. When Josh Hamilton hits a 480 foot homer, I want to be able to drool over it on youtube 30 times in a row. Instead, I’m stuck going to MLB.com and HOPING it might appear under the “Josh Hamilton Media Archive”. Seriously, Bud Selig, I was doing that in 2000. It’s 2011 now, run your product accordingly. I could criticize Selig all day; the man is integrating replay at such a brutally slow pace that you would think the technology was still in its infantile stages, but thats another article entirely. Since I cannot readily view Josh Hamilton, all I’m left with is his stats to tell me how good he is. I could just as well just buy a newspaper and get the same information MLB is providing me over the internet.

On the flip side, I was never much of a hockey fan until several years ago. A big reason? You guessed it, youtube! I can watch Alex Ovechkin scoring from his back any time I want. I can listen to Jack Edwards Patrick Bateman-esque cackle whenever I please. I’m not to only one of my friends to suddenly embrace the NHL in the last few seasons, and the added exposure of youtube is essential to our fandom. 

supercoolzs:

courtside:

I love Timmy. I love Arrested Development. It had to be done.

Like the guy in the $120 track jacket is going to get squeezed out of a photo booth. COME ON!